Helping Others Change

Posted by Naomi Vacaro on

Less Nagging and Bragging and More Grace
Jordan Sparnroft

If you’re like most humans, you are resistant to change. 
We especially dislike being told to change, even when we are actually ready to make that change! We know that we should work out, eat nutritious food, save money, not accrue debt, etc. But, being told to do those things tends to only irritate us.
However, when we hear how good someone feels by implementing small changes to their diet and exercise and see the changes that are happening in their body and in their moods, that’s when we're often actually motivated to implement the same behaviors.
So, how do we help other women form the habit of quiet time in a way that will actually be motivating? Here are some principles I’ve found to be helpful:
  1. Don’t nag your friends and family. 1 Peter 3 instructs wives to win their husbands for Christ not by their words but by their conduct. The same can be applied to all believers. When people see your joy, your peace, your love for others, they can’t help but wonder, ‘What’s different about her?” Obediently model your own joy by having consistent quiet time with Jesus and pray that God works in the hearts of those you love. 
  2. Let conversations originate organically and by the power of the Spirit. In the majority of my conversations about my personal quiet time, I have never brought the topic up. When my closest friends and family start expressing how they want to go deeper in their relationship with God, it’s been natural to tell them that reading the Bible for myself and seeking God in prayer has been more life-changing than just sitting in a pew once a week. 
  3. Reiterate grace. A common phrase that is used in the fitness industry is “progress over perfection”. The same can be applied to our walk with Christ. Jesus doesn’t expect us to be perfect nor does He have an Apple watch keeping track of our Quiet Time streaks. Reiterate this to your friends and family as they seek to develop this discipline. Encourage them to show up even if it's for 10 minutes or if they haven’t had a quiet time with God in weeks. Be a source of encouragement and grace. 

    Encouraging those we love to have daily quiet time with the Lord is important. But what is even more important is that we do so with gentleness and grace.



    Lives in historic central Virginia with her husband and daughter. She is a first-grade teacher at a Christian school and loves early mornings and spending time with her family.


Bible Reading Christian Living Friendship Hope Quiet Time Relationships Spiritual Growth

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