All these things can make me uniquely discouraging to people who aren’t as painfully conscientious, habitual, and word-oriented as I tend to be.
My husband of seven years, father of our three sons, spiritual leader of our home, and continual example of Christ-likeness is reading through the Bible for the first time.
My husband heard the Gospel and believed in Jesus. He has proven genuine faith by faithfully living out the Gospel he’s heard. He shows his genuine love for Jesus through daily repentance, selfless service to others, and steady reliance on God in every season. And my husband struggles with reading.
I’m a wife. It is not my job to tell him what to do or to shape his character. I can help him, not order him around. I can encourage him, not try to mold him into the man I intend him to be.
Maybe your husband wants to have daily time with Jesus and finds it really difficult to make that happen. Pray for him. Show God’s grace by being patient and not focusing very much on something that is likely discouraging for him.
Maybe your husband is disinterested in reading the Bible. Your words won’t force him into the heart hunger that drives us to Jesus each day. So, pray that God would stir his heart. If God leads you to say something, say it boldly, kindly, and humbly. And then, continue to quietly model your delight in spending time with Jesus.
It’s easy to equate a lack of quiet time with a lack of character. We do this to ourselves, and we can do this to our husbands. Maybe your husband is tired rather than lazy. Maybe he is really, truly not a morning person. Maybe he’s genuinely forgetful instead of disinterested. Maybe reading isn’t easy for him.
Discerning what’s actually going on helps us to be gracious instead of frustrated.
So, I started being thankful for him instead of discontent with him. I prayed and knew that God would continue His good work in his life. I realized that Leigh has struggles with reading and forgetfulness that I don’t have to deal with.
In the end, I just enjoyed my husband and continued to enjoy my own daily time with Jesus.
The desire to read the Bible continued to grow in Leigh. He again expressed this to me and instead of saying something along the lines of “Just do it,” I asked if I could help.
Friend, don’t fret, nag, or be frustrated. Trust God! Don’t be afraid of being more disciplined in a means of grace than your spouse. Don’t use the nourishment you get from your quiet time as a weapon against your husband. Don’t make his quiet time about your expectations.
2) Grow your love for your husband. Write something you appreciate about him every day and then pray for him.
3) Use all the tools for yourself! If reading is hard, listen to a Bible app! If mornings are rushed, have a lunch-break quiet time! Ask a friend to text you a reminder every day! Be creative.